The Chinchilla Interviews: Euterpe

Hi, Euterpe, and welcome to the interview with the chinchilla! I've really been looking forward to speaking with you, and I hope you'll find the experience as rewarding as this chinchilla does.

I've been waiting for you. I don't like to be kept waiting. You have been a very naughty chinchilla keeping me waiting.

Let's rock.

1. Whether you're writing about politics or Paris Hilton, your passion shines through in your blog postings. Have you always expressed your opinions freely, and, because you know I love two-part questions, what people in your life have most influenced you?

No, I have not always expressed my opinions freely. In the history of humankind, society has only recently accepted the spoken opinions of women, and children. As a child I was quite frustrated by being kept quiet. As I grew, I found it more and more difficult to hide my views. Once I learned to recognize those people who were intimidated by, and therefore afraid of, me, I distanced myself from them and associate with those who appreciate, but not necessarily agree with my views. I do become quite passionate about things (and people) that mean a great deal to me. The level of passion can rise quickly, and will burn hot, intimidating the weak.

People who have most influenced me. There are a multitude of individuals I look to for guidance in my life. Some are historical, some fictional, some are still on this side of the grass. Historical figures tend to be from the Holy Bible: Ruth, Deborah and the two Marys of the New Testament. Fictional characters such as Auntie Mame and Scarlett O'Hara are two favorites. Living inspirations, one is J.K. Rowling. Although Rowling did earn a bachelor's degree, she was an unemployed, single mother getting by on state assistance when she wrote the first Harry Potter book. She submitted it over and again until someone agreed to publish it.

There is a central theme to all of the people who influence me. They are strong, and independent minded. They have seen difficult times and survived. In one word, they are "survivors."

2. We're at the movies now. What are we most likely watching and where are we sitting in the theater?

I enjoy a variety of movie types, but detest excessive vulgar language, soft-porn and gore. I would love the opportunity to see some of the classics [Gone With the Wind, Casablanca , Auntie Mame, Anastasia] in the theatre setting. I enjoy the Harry Potter series, Lord of the Rings and Pirates of the Caribbean, and Star Wars (of course). We would sit in the center of the row, about 12 rows from front. Far enough back that I don't get a neck cramp but close enough to completely fill my field of vision, eliminating the distraction of others around us.

3. Time for the obligatory one: Would you ever wear a giant chinchilla mascot costume, and, if so, under what circumstance(s)?

I would absolutely NEVER wear such a costume! Chinchilla are beautiful, honorable creatures and should be treated with respect and care. Leave the costuming to less dignified animals like that mouse in Florida or the Banana Splits.

4. Has popular culture in America "jumped the shark"?

Most definitely. We have reached the point where nothing is sacred, no one is modest, and multiple body piercings are uninteresting. The "f" word has become common, sex is not sacred, and marriage is a joke.

I don't want to see some woman's tits hanging out of her clothes, the tramp-stamp on her ass or some guy with his pants down around his crack and his boxers up to his armpits.

5. What's your favorite sport/recreational activity?

To watch, I enjoy pro-football, NASCAR and bull riding. To do, I enjoy fishing, camping, walking, and swimming.

6. Let's shift gears. Tell us the punch line--and only the punch line--of your favorite joke.

Yeah, but who wants to be in an institution.

7. I'm giving you my magic black baseball cap, which gives the wearer amazing abilities. Today, it will give you the power to eliminate what you believe is the world's worst television commercial. What will we not have to endure watching anymore?

Feminine hygiene advertisements.

8. In under twenty-five words, describe what being a "West Virginian" means to you.

It means being a strong, independent survivor with the personal security to embrace the culture we have grown up in.

9. The chinchilla's looking for some parenting advice. Can you share any with him?

Trust your instincts.

Too many parents think that everyone else has the answer to their issues, when they have the answer but are afraid to trust themselves.

10. Where's your favorite vacation spot?

Anywhere that I can achieve maximum quiet/private time. I love the beach and I love the mountains. But, I love them best when I am alone, with no one talking in the background, only the sounds of the wind, bugs, birds and animals.

Thanks, Euterpe, for taking the time to interview with the chinchilla! I really appreciate your agreeing to do it, and I hope we can try it again!

You are quite welcome! Ask again anytime. It has been my pleasure.